I recently wrote about turning 30, and while for some it feels like a daunting milestone, for me, it feels like nothing short of a privilege. Growing older is something I have come to see as quietly beautiful. To have lived, learnt, and experienced three full decades of life is something I do not take lightly.
So, in the spirit of reflection, I wanted to sit down and write something for a younger version of myself. The girl is navigating those chaotic teenage years and the often tangled, uncertain path through her twenties. Not because I regret anything, but because hindsight brings clarity. And if I could offer her a little guidance, this is what I would say.
The Things I’d Tell You, If I Could
- Be cautious with your friendships, but do not close yourself off completely. The right people will come, but not everyone is meant to stay forever.
- Continue to trust wholeheartedly, even when it feels risky. That openness is a strength, not a weakness.
- Be ambitious in your career, but remember that success does not have to look like everyone else’s version of it.
- Do not be scared of change. It will feel uncomfortable, but it is often where growth quietly begins.
- Get help for your mental health sooner rather than later. You do not have to carry everything alone.
- Let fake friendships go without guilt. Holding onto them will only weigh you down.
- Do not change who you are to make others more comfortable. The right people will never require that of you.
- Do not allow people in positions of authority to take advantage of you. Your voice matters more than you realise.
- Be the kind of person others can lean on, but make sure you are not the only one doing the supporting.
- Take care of those closest to you. They will become your foundation in ways you cannot yet imagine.
- Let your hair down more often. Life is not meant to be lived entirely within structure.
- Learn how to communicate clearly and effectively. It will save you from so many misunderstandings.
- Treat yourself occasionally without guilt. Saving is important, but so is enjoying what you have worked for.
- Travel when you can. The experiences will stay with you far longer than anything material ever could.
- Spend more time with your family. They are your constant, even when everything else shifts.
- Push yourself outside of your comfort zone. That is where confidence begins to build.
- Take time to reflect and be proud of how far you have come. You will often forget to do this.
- Learn to drive sooner. It will give you a freedom you cannot yet fully appreciate.
- Do not shut yourself off from new friendships. Some of the most important people in your life are still yet to come.
- Set boundaries at work and stand by them. Being strong does not make you difficult.
- Never stop learning or improving your skills. Growth should always be ongoing.
- Take chances on yourself. You are far more capable than you give yourself credit for.
- Find your passions and follow them fully. They will shape your life in ways you cannot predict.
- Do the things that make you feel genuinely good, not just what looks good from the outside.
- Learn to process your emotions rather than suppress them. Avoiding them only delays the work.
- Enjoy your money, but do not feel the need to prove anything to anyone.
- Build a healthier relationship with food. It should nourish you, not control you.
- Make an effort to leave the house more, even when it feels easier to stay in your safe space.
- The people who once made your life difficult will not matter in the long run. Their impact fades.
- Build strong relationships, but never be the only one investing in them.
Final Thoughts
Turning 30 does not feel like an ending to me. If anything, it feels like a beginning. A chapter where things start to make sense, where confidence grows, and where life begins to feel more intentional.
I am stepping into this next decade as a mother, with a stronger sense of self, surrounded by people who genuinely matter, and with a life that feels stable and full of possibility. And if the past 30 years have taught me anything, it is that the best is often still yet to come.
